Patrick's Desk


"There is only one reason why you are not experiencing bliss at this present moment, and it's because you are thinking or focusing on what you don't have."

-Anthony DeMello
Inspiring Movies
Great Books
Great Friends
Current Projects
My Oops
Cool People
Patron Saint
My Mission
My Journal
My History
Inspiring Essays
Good Linking
My journal
Below are a year's worth (2002) of my journal entries. They are unedited, except that I have excluded any about my personal relationships. I'm posting these certainly not because I think my life more interesting than any others, but hopefully to connect with someone else who feels the same peaks and valleys of the journey.

Since I am not editing these entries, some explanation of what was going on in my life during 2002 is probably necessary. At the start of the year I had a burning and far-away dream of putting doing a one-man show. It's a dream that has both tugged at me and frightened me for years. I pursued that dream throughout the year. (I refer to my one-man show as my $95 story and then later as Mostly Funny, and then later as Man 1, Bank 0). I also suffered a ton of publishing rejections (possibly more than 50 for my book of stories -- something I've put my heart and soul into for seven years). At the same time though, my first book was somewhat miraculously published in French. Two big showcase opportunities came to nothing. One I bombed. The other was a personal triumph, but no sales. That's mostly what these journal entries cover, but hopefully they represent something larger: the universal things we feel when we try to reach our destiny.

God gave me a gift
love this quote
my friend jack did
State of my union:
just finished my national showcase
tonight i saw leguizamo
wow, 24 hours away from doing Mostly Funny
producer from barbara walters
did it. showcased for mostly funny.
grateful for:
after two showcases
i am tired. so tired.
just got the barbara walters interview
today it is hard for me to work because
homeless man stopped me today by saying I looked bright
i felt IT tonight.
maybe i better understand my times of unhappiness now
seemingly whenever i am alone and centered
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